The Ballad of Baron Von Tumbleweed's Trousers

Baron Von Tumbleweed, a man whose grace was inversely proportional to his enthusiasm, found himself in a predicament, as was his daily custom. Today's challenge: merely walking from his breakfast nook to the study without incident. He'd already lost a slipper to a rogue banana peel (pre-emptively dropped by himself, mind you) and nearly decapitated a valuable porcelain gnome named Bartholomew with a flailing arm. His wife, Countess Clotilde, merely sipped her Earl Grey, having long since learned that a sudden crash usually just meant the Baron was still breathing.

Today, however, promised a new level of physical comedy. Approaching the study door, he tripped over his own shadow – a feat requiring a certain kind of anti-talent – and instead of falling forward, executed a flawless (if unintentional) pirouette, only to catch his trousers on the antique coat rack. The resultant rip wasn't just substantial; it was a sartorial Grand Canyon, revealing his polka-dotted boxers to the startled gaze of Bartholomew (who, miraculously, had survived). The Baron, momentarily stunned, then declared, 'Aha! A new ventilation system! Most ingenious!' before promptly backing into a potted fern. Clotilde sighed, refilled her cup, and made a mental note to order more super glue.